Wednesday, January 14, 2004

So, Bush wants to put more crap, including people, on the moon. It's supposed to bring us together as a country

Ok then, if that's what he wants, sure.

Send a big fucking moon mission. Load up the transport with all kinds of people who would be an asset to us in space. Britney Spears, Justin Timberlake, Fred Durst, Brad Pitt, how about an entire fleet of trendy innocent pop stars gone trashy, SUV drivers who cover up the fact that they drive like shit by driving a FORD LANDMASS, Art "Fucking" Model, a large team of record executives and telemarketers, Mariah Carey, Gwyneth Paltrow, Ben Affleck, Jennifer Lopez, the lovely humans repsonsible for developing breast implants, lip injections, lyposuction and needless plastic surgery, the creators of MUZAK, advertising executives, yuppies, soccer moms, the Mc Donalds CEO, the DISNEY CEO, any other suit wearing corporate monkeys scratching themselves behind their mahogany veneer desks, and trash talk show hosts. Oh yeah. and Michael Jackson, just so it'll be easier to launch him back to whatever planet he came from.

Strap them all into skin tight silver suits with plastic bubble head thingies, feed them a diet of dehydrated ice cream that tastes like pizza and make them shower by using a vacuum. Send all of them, all the brightest minds of our generation up onto a dead, dusty inhospitable satelite. And let Bush be the one driving the damn thing. Oh, yeah, and Carl Rove can be the copilot. And let Dan Quayle hold the map.

There's a moon mission for you.

Bring on 2015.


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